How does Dcider protect my privacy?

Your decisions are stored securely in our database with encryption. We never sell your data or share it with third parties. The AI analysis happens on secure servers and isn't used to train AI models. You can delete your account and all data at any time from the app settings.

How much does Dcider cost?

Dcider offers a 7-day free trial with full access to all features. After that, it's $4.99/month or $44.99/year (25% off). The free trial doesn't require a credit card to start.

How is this different from a pros and cons list?

Traditional pros/cons lists treat all factors equally and rely on your in-the-moment thinking. Dcider weighs options against your pre-defined personal values, providing an objective alignment score. The AI also surfaces considerations you might miss and tracks patterns across all your decisions over time.

Does the AI make decisions for me?

No. Dcider provides analysis and alignment scores, but you always make the final choice. Think of it as a thinking partner that helps you see how options align with what you've said matters to you. The goal is clarity, not automation.

Can I use Dcider offline?

You can view your decision history and values offline. However, AI-powered analysis requires an internet connection since it's processed on secure cloud servers.

What kind of decisions is Dcider best for?

Dcider works great for career choices, financial decisions, relationship questions, health and lifestyle changes, and any decision where you want to align your choice with your personal values. It's especially helpful when you're overthinking or facing analysis paralysis.

How do I set up my values?

When you first open the app, you'll go through a quick onboarding where you select values that matter to you (like health, family, growth, financial security) and rate their importance. You can always adjust these later in Settings.

Is Dcider available on Android?

Currently, Dcider is iOS-only. We're focused on making the iOS experience great first. Android support may come in the future based on demand.

RelationshipsUpdated Jan 2026

Should I End a Relationship? A Values-Based Decision Framework

You find yourself cycling through doubt—some days certain you should leave, others wondering if you're throwing away something valuable. The fear of making the wrong choice in either direction keeps you stuck. You wonder if relationships are supposed to be this hard, or if you're not trying hard enough.

Key Takeaway

This decision is fundamentally about Love and Connection vs. Personal Growth. Your choice will also impact your compatibility.

The Core Values at Stake

This decision touches on several fundamental values that may be in tension with each other:

Love and Connection

Your need for deep emotional intimacy and partnership. Consider whether genuine love exists or if you're holding onto familiarity.

Personal Growth

Your ability to grow and develop as an individual. Evaluate whether the relationship supports or stunts your personal development.

Compatibility

The alignment of your values, goals, and lifestyles. Assess whether fundamental incompatibilities exist that can't be resolved.

Respect and Trust

The foundation of mutual respect and trust in your relationship. Consider whether these essential elements are present.

Future Alignment

Whether your visions for the future are compatible. Evaluate if you want the same things in life.

5 Key Questions to Ask Yourself

Before making this decision, work through these questions honestly:

1Am I in love with this person as they are now, or with who they were or who I hope they'll become?
2Have I clearly communicated my needs, and has my partner genuinely tried to meet them?
3What would I advise a close friend in the exact same situation?
4Am I staying out of love or out of fear (of being alone, starting over, hurting them)?
5Can I envision a happy future with this person based on reality, not wishful thinking?

Key Considerations

As you weigh this decision, keep these important factors in mind:

Whether core values and life goals are compatible

The presence of consistent effort from both partners

Whether fundamental issues have been addressed in therapy or earnest conversation

Your emotional and physical safety

Patterns of behavior vs. isolated incidents

Whether you've given the relationship a genuine chance to improve

The logistics of separation (housing, finances, children if applicable)

Watch Out For: Loss Aversion

The fear of losing what you have—shared history, invested time, familiar comfort—can keep you in a relationship longer than healthy. We tend to overvalue what we might lose and undervalue what we might gain. Consider what you're losing by staying in a relationship that isn't serving you.

Make This Decision With Clarity

Don't just guess. Use Dcider to calculate your alignment score and make decisions that truly reflect your values.

Download on the App Store

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I know if my relationship is worth saving?

Consider: Is there mutual respect and willingness to work on issues? Are the problems solvable with effort, or are they fundamental incompatibilities? Has couples therapy been tried? Is there abuse or addiction? Relationships with mutual commitment to growth can improve. Those with contempt, stonewalling, or abuse rarely do.

Is it normal to think about ending your relationship?

Occasional doubts are normal in long-term relationships. Persistent, recurring thoughts about leaving—especially if you've felt this way for months or years—deserve attention. The question isn't whether doubts exist but whether they dominate your thinking and whether the relationship brings you more pain than joy.

How long should I try to fix a relationship before ending it?

There's no universal timeline, but consider whether you've: clearly communicated your needs, given your partner opportunity to change, tried professional help, and seen genuine effort. If you've done these things for 6-12 months without meaningful progress, you've likely tried enough. Don't sacrifice years hoping for change that isn't coming.

Should I stay in an unhappy relationship for the kids?

Children benefit more from having happy, healthy parents—even if separated—than from living with parents in a miserable relationship. Kids learn about relationships from watching their parents. Staying 'for the kids' often models dysfunction. That said, divorce should still be a last resort after exhausting other options.

How do I end a long-term relationship?

Be direct, kind, and clear. Choose an appropriate time and private place. Explain your decision without excessive blame. Be firm—this isn't a negotiation. Prepare for their reaction but don't let guilt change your decision. Have a practical plan for separating logistics. Consider having a therapist to help process the transition.

Related Decisions

Should I Move to a New City?

The pull of a new city comes with romantic notions of reinvention and adventure. But underneath the excitement lies real anxiety about leaving behind familiar places, established relationships, and the life you've built. You wonder if change will bring fulfillment or just new problems in an unfamiliar setting.

Should I Change Careers?

The desire for a career change often builds gradually—a growing sense that you're in the wrong place, doing work that doesn't resonate. But the prospect of starting over, potentially at a lower level or salary, creates paralyzing fear. You wonder if the grass really is greener or if you're just restless.

Should I Quit My Job?

The thought of quitting your job often comes with a mix of excitement and dread. You might feel trapped between the security of your current position and the pull of something better, leaving you paralyzed by uncertainty about whether leaving is brave or reckless.

People Also Considered

Similar decisions in other areas of life:

Start a Business Take a Sabbatical Travel Long-Term

Sources

VanderDrift, L. E., Agnew, C. R., & Wilson, J. E. (2009). Nonmarital romantic relationship commitment and leave behavior: The mediating role of dissolution consideration. Personal Relationships.doi:10.1111/j.1475-6811.2009.01221.x
Sbarra, D. A. (2006). Predicting the onset of emotional recovery following nonmarital relationship dissolution. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin.doi:10.1177/0146167205285473

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